ON ISTIKHAARAH AND SPOUSE SELECTION
السلام عليكم، ورحمة الله، وبركاته…ياالشيخ
نعمة يوم الجمعة
نسال الله ان يبارك لنا فيه… امين
عندي سؤال، يا الشيخ
نعم
جزاكم الله خيرا يا الشيخ
- Is it compulsory to do Istikhaarat to choose a spouse?
- Does Istikhaarat have any positive impact in that regard?
- I’m asking because I continue to have issues with all potential spouses I met and conducted an Istikhaarat on, with the exception of none…not even one.
- Hence, my inquiry.
بارك الله فيكم يا الشيخ
ANSWER:
Alhamdulillah Wa As-Salaatu Wa As-salaamu ‘Alaa Rasulillah Wa Aalihi Wasahbihi Wasallam.
Assalamu Alaykum Warahmatullah Wabarakaatuh
Beloved brother, may Allah bless you and grant you Tawfiq and Sadaad, Amin.
Know, may Allah bless you and me, that the Ulamaa are at agreement that the Istikhaarah is a Sunnah and not Compulsory and that it is done not on all matters but on matters about which the Believer doubts and is at will to choose one of many. This was mentioned by Imaam An-Nawawi in Al-Majmuu’u.
Likewise, the Sunnah of the Rasul salallahu alayhi wasallam with regards to Istikhaarah is to seek counsel (Istishaarah) before Istikhaarah.
Imam An-Nawawi said:
“It is preferred that he seeks sound counsel before the Istikhaarah from the one whose condition is known to be Sound Advice, Empathy, and experience. And whose Din and understanding is trusted. Allah ta’ala said:
وشاورهم في الأمر
“And seek their counsel in all matters”
Then when he has sought counsel and it has become apparent that it is Mas’lahah, he should seek Allah’s Istikhaarah in that matter…”
It follows from this, that Istikhaarah is a seeking of blessing from Allah and an emptiness of the mind from inclining toward one or more of the possible choices available, seeking that Allah directs your heart toward that which is the best for you in this world and the next.
Istikhaarah of course has an impact on the choices that we make, but that is only if we did it in the way of the Sunnah and also seek sound counsel from people of Empathy, sound advice, and experience who have both sense and knowledge. Contrary to what some people think, it is not just about the Raka’atayn and the wordings of the Istikhaarah, it should be preceded by sound advice seeking and other considerations.
As for Marriage and Spouse selection, there are recommendations from the Shar’iah on the things to consider and the steps to follow. It is hoped that when those steps and recommendations are followed, the risks of unhappiness in the Marriage is curtailed to the minimum. May Allah grant you ease in your home, harmony, and grace, amin.
May the light of His Nur shine through your home and the lives of yourself and your progeny, amin.
Barakallahu fikum
Jazākumullāhu Khayran.